Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Open Adoption Top 10

Top Ten Reasons I love having an open adoption:
  1. I love that my kids know where they came from... know *who* they came from.  They don't have to wonder!  They don't have to make something up!
  2. I love that I have a connection to amazing people that I wouldn't otherwise know.  I love that I can genuinely tell my kids that I love their birthfamily.
  3. I love that when we visit, it naturally forces them to rethink adoption and how everyone fits into the story.  Each year there is new understanding and growth.  (I didn't really love Aidan telling me I am like his babysitter, but I do like that we had the opportunity to correct that misunderstanding!)
  4. I love that even when there is sadness, they can process that grief in small chunks at ages when they still allow me to cuddle them in my lap and smother them with kisses.
  5. I love taking a vacation to North Carolina every year!
  6. I love that they will know where they got their curly hair and blue eyes.  I remember when we were waiting for our first baby, someone asked where my curls came from.  As I was answering, I felt so sad that my child might not be able to answer such a simple, innocent question.  I love that with our openness, they can easily answer.
  7. I love seeing the joy in the birthfamily when they see what cute little pumpkins we have!  And they don't mind at all when we brag about them and talk about every little cute thing they do!
  8. I love that maintaining our connection has promoted healing on every side- theirs, ours, and the kids.
  9. I love that every time we visit, I learn useful information, like everyone in their family is small as a young child, so I shouldn't worry about Jack.  Or they all had to go to speech therapy, so it isn't a big surprise that Jack and Aidan have to go as well.
  10. I love that they make my children feel loved and wanted.

2 comments:

mommymuse said...

Amen, amen, amen!!!! With Mother's Day and all my kids' bdays recently passing, I've been feeling sooooo much gratitude for the amazing, awesome blessing of having their birthfamilies in my life. I never could have imagined how much love adoption has brought into my life. I'm so grateful to KNOW them--not just little scraps of information on a form, but as real flesh and blood people. As always, you put it so well!

Katie said...

Super post! I totally agree.